T5 coming

Latest update on Isabel

We had another appointment with the Perinatologist today. We had another ultrasound too. The newest news is that now they believe Isabel has Bilateral Renal Agenesis. It just means that they don't see any kidneys at all. At one point, someone thought that there was one multi-cystic kidney, now they believe her kidneys never developed at all. She has no kidneys. They also say there is no amniotic fluid at all. She is also still in the breech position. No one expects her to move, with no fluid. She doesn't move very much, just little small jerks or shudders. It's sad.

She has grown steadily from the last time we had an ultrasound, so they question my due date. I know when I had my LMP and I also know when I had the positive pregnancy test, but going by her measurements, they say my due date is August 17th. My original due date is July 14th. This was also depressing news for me, as I now get to be pregnant an extra month (possibly), not to mention the torture of drawing this whole thing out even longer. They say that if she truly was growth retarded, she wouldn't have grown much in the last 3 wks. It's confusing. I don't really understand what is going on.

I also have developed gestational diabetes, so if she grows into a large baby, which is what they often do, that would pose more of a problem with labor, being that she is breech.

It was a tiring day.

Another sock for Isabel

We have decided to name our baby Isabel. Isabel means "Consecrated to God".

Here is the latest sock I knitted for Isabel. This one is much smaller than the first.

Here you can see their size relative to a notebook page. Since we don't know how big she will be at birth, I am trying to make a few different size pairs.

Socks

Here is my first sock. It turned out too big. I think it will fit T2

Here's another hat with another yarn.

This is a chenille quilt my mom helped me make out of flannel.


The channels up close.

Hat done

Actually I've made two hats from this yarn (different sizes) and another one out of a different yarn. I will post a picture soon.

A hat for baby

I went to the knitting shop in town and got some help starting a little hat for baby.

Baby update

We spent the day at the hospital for more ultrasounds. They basically found the same information, today they said they could see no fluid at all. The baby is in the breech position and is unlikely to move due to the lack of amniotic fluid. The doctor said it isn't impossible for the baby to change positions, he has seen it happen, but it's not likely. I will be praying that the baby does change to a head down position.

They were able to tell us they think the baby is a little girl. The doctor who did the first ultrasound we had done on Friday thought it was a girl too. We are now praying about a name.

When a baby fails to develop kidneys, it is called Renal Agenesis or Potter's Syndrome.

I appreciate all of the emails we have received and especially your prayers. We are in shock and feel such sadness at the change in our future. We were anticipating with joy the addition of a sweet little thing to our family and dreaming of the day when she would join us. We were counting down the weeks. Now, it's the opposite. We don't want that day to come because we know what it most likely holds.

Do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. - Isaiah 41 : 10

Our Baby

God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear. Though the earth be removed, and though mountains be carried into the midst of the sea; Though the waters thereof roar and be troubled, though the mountains shake with the swelling thereof. Psalm 46: 1-3


We have recently received some devastating news about our baby. We had an ultrasound on Friday, then had another more extensive ultrasound on Saturday to confirm what Friday’s had found.

I am 29 weeks along. The baby shows severe growth restriction. It is only measuring 23 weeks 4 days. As far as they can see, the baby only has one kidney, and this one is filled with cysts (multi-cystic) and therefore only working just a bit, if at all. The doctor cannot find a bladder. Since there is no / very little kidney function the baby is unable to pee, therefore there is almost no amniotic fluid. They usually see 10-26 cm of fluid, I have 1cm. Since there is no fluid, the baby’s lungs have not been able to develop. The baby’s movements are very limited also because of the lack of fluid. The doctor said this is just 1 in 10,000 and we get to be the 10,000th.

The prognosis is very grim. Aside from a miracle from God, there is nothing they can do to help the baby and told us it will certainly die either in the womb or within minutes of birth. After receiving this news, we wanted to know what the sex of the baby is, but since there is no fluid, it’s very difficult to see clearly.

The options they gave us were pretty horrible:

“Terminate” the pregnancy – By a ‘D an E’, (Dilation and evacuation) this would be an abortion.
“Terminate” the pregnancy – by inducing labor and then injecting the baby with a drug to stop it’s heart BEFORE it is born.

This one was unbelievable. Since the Supreme Court recently ruled Partial Birth Abortions illegal, apparently they just go around that in this way. Since they would be inducing labor early (too early), they would have to kill the baby before it leaves the womb then it wouldn’t be a live birth, and NOT a partial birth abortion. The perinatologist wouldn’t really go into detail, but they were clear that they would not induce me and let me give birth to a live baby, they would HAVE to inject it with this drug to stop it’s heart before it was born. Clearly these are not options we were interested in.

We have decided to do nothing except pray and wait. The baby could die anytime in the womb, or I could carry it another 11 wks to term. I should be able to have the baby vaginally either way.

Obviously, we are so sad at this news. We’ve had a lot of tears here and I don’t see them stopping anytime soon. When Sophia sees me crying, she comes up to me with a Kleenex and a kiss saying, “Oh honey…honey…happen?” or “Mama sad?”

We know God is in control. We would appreciate your prayers.

Baby update: 20 weeks

The other day I had an appointment with my midwife, Desiree. I was laying down on a bed so Desiree could listen to the T4's heartbeat. My one and a half year old daughter clambered up on the bed next to me, curious to know what this lady was doing to Mama.

When Desiree would turn away to do something else, T3 always quickly pulled my shirt down to the 'proper' position. This happened quite a few times. Then she decided to lay next to me and pull her shirt up so that Desiree could listen to her tummy. We all enjoyed watching her immensely.

As far as me, I am not as big as I thought I would be at 5 months, but am beginning to feel the baby's flutterings. I still am not feeling as good as I'd like, but taking it easy most of the time.

Babywatch: 15 weeks - Morning sickness update

At around 4 inches long, crown to rump, your baby now weighs about 2 1/2 ounces. He's busy inhaling and exhaling amniotic fluid, which will help develop the air sacs in his lungs. His legs are growing longer than his arms now, and he can move all his joints and limbs. That means his hands are more functional, too. Sweat glands are appearing, and although his eyelids are fused shut, he can sense light. If you shine a flashlight at your tummy, he's likely to move away from the beam. There's not much for your baby to taste at this point, but his taste buds are beginning to form. And if you have an ultrasound, you may be able to find out whether your baby's a boy or girl!

Our baby will be 15 weeks this Saturday. On Monday, the kids and I went to see my midwife. She has a few model babies for varies ages of development. I think she has a 10 wk, 15 wk, 20 wk and 30 wk. When I was 10 weeks, I was able to hold the 10 wk old model. It was amazing to me. It was much bigger than I thought it would be.

I traced it on a piece of paper, here it is below:

Well, this time, I was 14 wks, she showed me the 15 wk model. I held it in my hand and marvelled at how big it was! The kids all held it too. My daughter walked around cuddling it. It was so cute. T2 looked at the 30 wk model and then started tossing it up in the air! That was a little...um...wrong! It's just a model, but it's still a life-like infant. We all laughed.

Here is a wider shot to give you some perspective on the actual size.

The summary of the visit. Here are the supplements I am taking:

• Prenatals
• 4 tsp. cod liver oil (divided doses)
• 500 mg. magnesium aspartate (divided doses)
• Milk thistle 3x day with meals (supports liver, for nausea)
• Digestive enzymes with meals
• BerryGreen drink (The package says "delicious" but I don't know who these people are?)
• Acidophillus or kefir (or both)
• No sugar diet

For those of you wondering how the morning sickness / milk thistle journey goes I still have very good news for you! I am 15 wks and did not throw up one single time this pregnancy! That's right. Nada!!

I haven't been feeling very good starting about 10 wks though. I felt this way the last 2 pregnancies. It's not morning sickness, or nausea. It's slow digestion I think. Basically, my stomach hurts, aches with food. I'm not quite sure what to do about it. I do take digestive enzymes with meals and sometimes Betaine HCL in addition to those, in hopes of helping my tummy process the foods. Right now, raw veggies seem too harsh, and nothing much really sounds good.

Maybe I will stumble upon an answer soon, or just start feeling better.

Babywatch: 9 Weeks

Your baby is nearly an inch long — barely the size of a grape — and weighs just a fraction of an ounce, but he's poised for rapid weight gain now that his basic physical structure is in place. He's also starting to look more and more human. His embryonic "tail" is now completely gone and his body parts — including organs, muscles, and nerves — are kicking into gear.His eyelids are fused shut and won't open until 27 weeks. He has earlobes, and by week's end, the inner workings of his ears will be complete. His upper lip is fully formed, too, and his mouth, nose, and nostrils are more distinct. The tips of his fingers are slightly enlarged where his touch pads are developing. All major joints — his shoulders, elbows, wrists, knees, and ankles — are working, enabling your baby to move his limbs. As for his heart, it has divided into four chambers now, and the valves have started to develop. External sex organs are there, but won't be distinguishable as male or female for another few weeks.

I am so excited to still be on my feet and feeding my family, rather than laying on the couch in between trips to the bathroom. Thank you Lord! I am having a little trouble with the cod liver oil these days though.

Babywatch: 8 Weeks

Your baby is now 5/8 of an inch long, about the size of a kidney bean. She's constantly moving and shifting, although you won't be able to feel these womb wiggles for several weeks yet. Her embryonic tail is disappearing, and her eyelids practically cover her eyes. Still slightly webbed, her fingers and toes are growing longer. Her arms have lengthened, too, and her hands are now flexed at the wrist and meet over her heart. Her knee joints have formed, and her feet may be long enough to meet in front of her body. With her trunk straightening out, her head is more erect. Breathing tubes extend from her throat to the branches of her developing lungs. The nerve cells in her brain are also branching out to connect with one another, forming primitive neural pathways.

At 8 weeks I can thankfully report that I feel pretty great. I have my moments where I feel a little twinge, but I mean *really* little. I can't believe how great I feel! I really have to thank the Lord and consider this success due to the milk thistle at this point.

6 Weeks

Your baby's heart is growing and dividing into the right and left chambers. But the most exciting part is that her tiny heart is now beating (at a speedy 100 to 130 beats a minute) and pumping blood throughout her body. The cells that will make up all of your baby's body parts and systems are dividing furiously as her body begins to take shape. Right now she's about the size of a small lentil bean (4 to 5 millimeters across).

It's so cute, after I took this picture, I showed the kids that our baby is this big. We were all saying, "Oh, baby" and petting the lentil bean with our finger saying "baby". Sophia wanted to see the baby. She would softly caress the 'baby'. Later she saw the bean sitting on the table and called out "Baby!" She wanted the baby to hold.

5 Weeks

Deep in your uterus your embryo is growing at a furious pace. At this point he's about the size of a sesame seed, and he looks more like a tiny tadpole than a human. He's now made up of three layers — the ectoderm, mesoderm, and endoderm — that will later form his organs and tissues. The cells are forming for his major organs, including his kidneys and liver, and his neural tube is beginning to develop. This neural tube — from which your baby's brain, spinal cord, nerves, and backbone will sprout — develops in the top layer, called the ectoderm. This layer will also give rise to his skin, hair, nails, mammary and sweat glands, and tooth enamel. His heart and circulatory system begin to form in the middle layer, or mesoderm. (This week, in fact, his tiny heart begins to divide into chambers and beat and pump blood.) The mesoderm will also form your baby's muscles, cartilage, bone, and subcutaneous (under skin) tissue. The third layer, or endoderm, will house his lungs, intestines, and rudimentary urinary system, as well as his thyroid, liver, and pancreas. In the meantime, the primitive placenta and umbilical cord, which deliver nourishment and oxygen to your baby, are already on the job.

After reading this I am more convicted to eat so well. No sugar, no junk! Taking my cod liver oil and my milk thistle for morning sickness.